setting boundaries Archives - StepMom Magazine

To The Stepmom Who Feels Like She’s Lost Herself

THIS MONTH’S FEATURED ARTICLE:
How to Find The Woman You Used to Be
By Heather Hetchler, MA
Inside the October 2021 Issue

Halloween is a time when children dress up and go door to door, collecting treats while pretending to be someone else. They may put on masks or makeup and wear costumes which reflect the characters of their choosing. Putting on a persona for just one day and pretending to be another person is intended to be fun for a child.

For a stepmom, however, becoming someone unrecognizable is a slow fade rather than a one-day occurrence—and it’s nothing to celebrate. One of the scariest things a stepmom can navigate, I’d say, is losing herself in the process of trying to build up her stepfamily. If this has been your experience, read on! What follows are five tips for finding the way back to YOU. Continue reading “To The Stepmom Who Feels Like She’s Lost Herself”

Inside the July 2019 Issue

See what else is inside the July 2019 issue … Continue reading “Inside the July 2019 Issue”

The Assertive Stepmom: Inside the March 2018 Issue

The Assertive Stepmom
How to ‘Say’ What You Need to Say
BY MARY T. KELLY, MA

American Singer/Songwriter and Guitarist John Mayer won a 2008 Grammy for “Best Male Pop Vocal Performance” for his rendition of “Say” (2007), which originally appeared on the “Bucket List” film soundtrack. I find the song wonderful and wise.

When you’re a woman partnered with someone who has children, there’s a lot you’d like to say. Still, you leave lots of things unsaid. Continue reading “The Assertive Stepmom: Inside the March 2018 Issue”

Setting Boundaries: Inside the January 2018 Issue

Don’t Be a Doormat! A Stepmom’s Guide to Setting Healthy Boundaries BY CLAUDETTE CHENEVERT

What’s worse than feeling invisible, ignored or unappreciated?

Being treated like a doormat. You do your best, as a stepmom. You give up time and money to be available for your stepkids. You listen patiently to your husband’s complaints about his ex. You grit your teeth, while said ex makes unreasonable demands on both you and your family. Continue reading “Setting Boundaries: Inside the January 2018 Issue”

Stupid Things People Say to Stepmoms: Inside the Oct. 2017 Issue

Stupid Things People Say to Stepmoms: Dealing With Askholes (and Other Rude Humans) By Mary T. Kelly, MA

Stepmoms aren’t the only ones who get asked questions which are nobody else’s business. Or who get advice that’d make your head spin. Ask any woman who’s been pregnant how many horror stories she’s heard about labor and delivery—from perfect strangers— which scared the crap out of her. The numbers are astronomical. Continue reading “Stupid Things People Say to Stepmoms: Inside the Oct. 2017 Issue”

Moms and Stepmoms: Inside the July 2017 Issue

Exclusive! What Moms Want Stepmoms to Know: 8 Ways to Make Stepfamily Life Easier on Everyone by Blythe Ward, MEd

In my years as a therapist working with stepfamilies, many of my female clients expressed anger and frustration over feeling as if their stepkids’ mothers were making life very difficult for them. But not only was I a therapist. I was also a biological mother to two young boys. After my marriage to their father finally collapsed, my ex-husband remarried a woman who did not have any children of her own. Continue reading “Moms and Stepmoms: Inside the July 2017 Issue”

Inside the January 2017 Issue

The January 2017 issue of StepMom Magazine is HERE!

→ Why Stepcouples Must Present a United Front
→ 4 Rules for Ditching Anger and Negativity
→ Protecting Your Assets During Your Stepkids’ Teen Years
→ Teaching Your Stepkids to Respect Personal Boundaries
→ 6 Ways to Combat Loneliness in Stepfamily Land
→ 10 Tips to Make 2017 a Banner Year
→ And much more!
Continue reading “Inside the January 2017 Issue”

The Stepmom Step Back: Inside the June 2016 Issue

Stepmoms Who Disengage: How to Step Back Without Stepping on Toes by Brenda Snyder, LCSW

So, here you find yourself: You—a bright and articulate woman—have suddenly realized that whatever it is you’ve been doing to make this stepmom gig work hasn’t worked at all. In response, you examined your loving heart and reassessed your intentions to be sure they were pure.

Still, you’re met with hostility or, somehow even worse, apathy. Continue reading “The Stepmom Step Back: Inside the June 2016 Issue”

The High-Conflict Ex – Inside the April 2016 Issue

High Conflict Ex Wife — Inside the April 2016 Issue

The High-Conflict Ex: 5 Tips for Managing Your Partner’s Past by Trisha Ladogna

Dealing with a high-conflict ex can be one of the hardest things a stepcouple faces. It can be difficult to know what to do or where to get the right support. The tension and conflict it stirs up can cause us to act against our natural instincts when it comes to arriving at trusting, open, empathetic responses and managing difficulty.

If not handled well, it can cause us to become edgy and feel defensive—or entirely helpless. These negative feelings and responses can then spill over into our relationships with our partners, children and stepchildren to create chaos in our most important relationships. Continue reading “The High-Conflict Ex – Inside the April 2016 Issue”

Stepmom Resentment – Inside the February 2016 Issue

Stepmoms Who Give Too Much: 4 Signs You’re Pushing Yourself Down the Path of Martyrdom by Claudette Chenevert

Stepmom resentment. As stepmoms, we sometimes sacrifice time with friends, extended family and even ourselves to cater to our partners and/or stepkids. We do this in part (and often subconsciously) in the hope that we’ll be viewed as the ideal stepmom—the one who’s there for everyone. Yet, when we’re finally exhausted and recognize we’re in need of help, little to none can be found.

Do you ever try to be all things to all people only to realize that no one truly notices or benefits from it as much as you thought they would? Continue reading “Stepmom Resentment – Inside the February 2016 Issue”

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