The December 2015 issue of StepMom Magazine is HERE!
It’s known as the most wonderful time of the year. But, for many stepmoms, the holidays create unique stress and family tension.
Most families must make decisions about where to celebrate, when and with whom—but stepfamilies face extra challenges. Every year stepmoms ask: When are the kids coming over? Are the kids coming over? How do we manage everyone’s traditions?
The articles in this month’s issue are designed to take you back to simpler times and help you remember that as a stepmom you must focus on what you can control and to let go of what you can’t. You might just find that letting go doesn’t nullify your past—it helps you enjoy the present.
Holidays and family go together. Except when they don’t. There are many reasons stepfamilies aren’t together for the holidays. Sometimes, it’s a legal decree. Other times, one parent changes plans at the last minute or won’t allow the kids to come over. Kids may even choose (or be forced to choose) not to come to your home for the holidays at all.
The November 2015 issue of StepMom Magazine is HERE!
Thanksgiving is just around the corner. It’s a time of the year when we collectively gather to focus on our blessings, not our burdens. In her article on page 15, Trisha Ladogna explains why practicing gratitude–even when we don’t want to–can improve our outlook, our attitude and our overall well-being. But let’s be honest. Feeling grateful, when our lives feel particularly difficult, isn’t easy.
So how do you give thanks when stepfamily life is challenging? You practice. We’ll show you how and much more (like how to stop stressing over the ex, how to get your stepkids to communicate more and what to do if your partner feels caught in the middle between you and his kids) inside this month’s issue.
Whenever I think of family dinners, the image of Norman Rockwell’s “Freedom From Want” (which appeared on a 1943 cover of “The Saturday Evening Post” and depicts an animated gathering around a perfectly cooked turkey) I wonder, how can my family look like that?
The Stepfamily Recipe: Satisfy Your Stepfamily’s Needs by Recognizing Its Unique Ingredients by Dianne Martin, BSW, RSW
Many couples enter stepfamily life unaware of the monumental challenges they will encounter—challenges that often result from failing to appreciate the numerous structural and functional differences between first families and remarried families.
After all, the two have just about as much in common as apples and oranges.
YOU CAN’T HELP IT. YOU THINK ABOUT HIS EX-WIFE ALL THE TIME. If this sounds like you, your internal dialogue likely includes thoughts that revolve around:
⊲ How crazy she is
⊲ How mean she is to you
⊲ How she ruins your lives
⊲ How she hounds your partner
⊲ How she makes up lies about you
⊲ How she turns the kids against you
⊲ How you can’t get a shred of relief
Your partner is sitting on the floor, playing with his kids. It’s been a few weeks since they were last together and they seem to be having a good time catching up. Here you are, looking at them, when an empty feeling creeps up inside you.
You know he will always be a father. His kids come first. As a stepmom, you will need to adjust to their way of doing things.
These are just some of the messages I received when I decided to marry a man with kids. I’m not going to lie. Those words of encouragement—or lack thereof—were less than I had hoped for. After such rave reviews, what mentally stable person would sign up for this gig? Me. And given that you’re reading StepMom Magazine, I’m assuming you, too.
Stepparenting Together? How Stepmoms’ and Stepdads’ Experiences Differby Trisha Ladogna
Have you ever wondered if stepdads have it easier?
Becoming a stepmother after spending time as a single parent means parenting like you have never experienced it before. You have the unique experience of beginning your stepparenting journey at the very same time, in the very same place, as your partner.