FOR THE MEN!
5 Tips for Remarried Men: Stepping Up When Your Marriage Is Falling Down by Andy Hetchler
Remarriage with kids is complicated.
My wife and I were madly in love when we said, “I do,” and brought our six kids together. We still love each other, but somewhere early in the journey mad about you turned into mad at you.
A slow fade occurred, in the early years of our marriage, which led to a pollution of the head and heart—for both of us. We loved each other. That wasn’t the issue. We started to not like each other. Our view of one another shifted and we needed to get back to that center space where we trusted each other emotionally.
During that time, my wife brought concerns of my kids to me and I often did nothing about them. She saw how I dealt with difficult situations in the workplace (for example, putting underperforming employees on probation) and couldn’t figure out how it was I didn’t see stuff in our own home or why it was I would back away from giving a consequence to my 9-year-old.
I recognized even then that she had good intentions, yet I saw her as viewing my kids too critically. She was frustrated because she felt that her plate was overflowing and I wasn’t stepping up. I was frustrated because I thought she wanted me to handle things that didn’t matter. …To read the rest of this article log in to your account and download the June 2016 issue. Don’t have an account? Click here to subscribe.