Mini-Wives: A Stepmom’s Guide to Dealing With His Dominating Daughter by Mary T. Kelly, MA
Are you having stepdaughter issues?
PICTURE THIS: It’s your wedding day and you’re marrying the ideal man for you. Granted, he comes with a 6-year-old daughter—but you’ve known her for a while and you get along well. Your special day is going to be perfect!
Imagine your surprise when it’s time for the first dance and your brand spanking new husband reaches out for his daughter’s hand and leads her to the dance floor. You’re left standing there, as heat fills your cheeks and you attempt a feeble smile aimed at the guests, hoping that the pounding in your heart isn’t noticeable.
Yet, it only gets worse. She helps him cut the cake and he insists that she go on the honeymoon with you because, after all, this level of change “is just really hard on her.”
Valentine’s Day rolls around. Your partner tells you he’s taking you and his daughter to dinner—because he wants you both to feel special. His daughter proceeds to sit on his lap, interrupts you and even ignores you. From where you’re sitting, you can see that she’s manipulating your partner while undermining you.
You’re left holding your head in your hands, thinking, “How did I end up like this?”
As crazy as these scenarios sound, I’ve heard them play out all too often among my clients. I confess to having been shocked the first time I heard these stories. Over time, however, they lost their shock value.
There truly is a prevalence, among stepmoms, to experience stepdaughters as competition: as mini-wives. …To read the rest of this article, log in to your account and download the February 2016 issue. Don’t have an account? Click here to subscribe.