Have your plans ever been foiled by an ex wanting to take a spur-of-the-moment holiday trip sans kids? A wacky plan to which your partner said, “Yeah, we’ll take ’em!”— thus extinguishing your sugar plum visions of dinner and dancing with the sweetie on New Year’s Eve? (We have.)
Maybe your at-home stepfamily Christmas celebration was derailed by a text
to your hubby that read: “Come by after 11. The kids are still opening presents.” Or, “Their other grandparents just popped by for a surprise visit from Santa! I’ll drop them o at 4 p.m. Maybe 5.” Determined to keep the turkey intact, you wait and wait, which leads to an argument that ruins the whole day.
Hi, my name is Christine and I’ve dated a guy with kids. (In unison: “Hi, Christine.”) This month, Claudette and I go where no stepmom duo has gone before: To year-end Holiday Hell and back again. A la the three wise men, we set three initial goals—ones that deliver the gift of Claudette’s professional wisdom and shed light on seasonal topics to which you can relate.
We made a list of holiday concerns stepmoms and stepmoms-in-the-making often grapple with. We checked it twice and tackled each issue one-by-one, accounting for a full range of naughty behaviors. We then wrapped it in sensible tips for celebrating your year-end holidays, while answering questions like:
◃ Who should spend which holidays where?
◃ Is this holiday for couples, families or both?
◃ How do I get him to take my needs seriously
◃ Should he and his kids simply do their own thing at some point during the holiday?
◃ -&- How can I preserve our Thanksgiving, New Year’s or other plans?
What follows are valid reasons for making New Year’s Eve a sacred night out, ways to turn ugly situations into cause for celebration and tips for making decisions that include a backup plan.
If you worry that her plans may foil your own as Hanukkah approaches or that you’ll be nursing the needs of a possessive stepkid on New Year’s Eve (rather than dancing the two-step as the two of you serve each other champagne and shrimp cocktail), read on! …To read the rest of this article, log in to your account and download the November 2016 issue. Don’t have an account? Click here to subscribe.